Social...not so much.

A few days ago I woke up with a heavy heart. My 10 year old son is not doing well in school right now, socially. It's been going on for just over a year and really started affecting his grades. I can handle that; it just tears me up to see him so miserable.

We take so many things for granted, like, my child with make friends easily and always feel loved and socially acceptable. But that doesn't happen naturally for everyone, including him. He is the type that hangs in the background, unsure of himself and how he fits in, unable to speak up and take the first small step to making a stranger a friend. Small talk with his peers does not come easy to him. He is his father's son.


So, after dealing with the grades aspect, and pushing him to make just one good friend, I thought we were good. But I started noticing some ongoing problems, compounded by his ever changing emotional state (thank you, puberty!). I feel like I finally got to the bottom of the problem this week when he had a mini breakdown and admitted just how bad it is at school for him every day.

Hiding at recess, crying because no one wants to play with him, sitting alone at free time...just typing those words makes me want to bawl.

I'm still peeling away at the layers to this situation, talking with his teacher, his sister/confidant, and my most valuable ally, my Heavenly Father.

 I'm not sure how much of this is, for lack of a better phrasing, in his head. I think he has serious insecurity issues. On top of that, I think he's not at the same level of maturity as most boys his age, and so they don't know how to respond to his attempts at humor and fitting in. What's funny to him makes his classmates scratch their heads in confusion. I've seen it with my own eyes and his teacher confirmed that this week when I spoke to her.

It seems so easy to me. Walk in, make eye contact, smile, say hi. How's it going? What did you do this weekend? Do you like Star Wars/cake/riding bikes? But what comes so easy to most of us is like walking into a nest of hornets for him. He'd rather die. And at the tender age of 10, he already expects the negative. Weird looks, walking off, solitude.

But I serve a faithful, love God who controls the wind, the rain, the spin of the earth, the cycle of seasons...the One Who created all, is in all, and by Whom all exists. The One that formed the spirit in man...He's able to strengthen, to change perception, to increase courage. He's been made aware of the problem and we're working on it together. Meaning, I'm stressing, repenting for stressing, putting it back in His hands. Then repeat.

Please, if you know him, don't try to talk with him about it. Just pray. I want God to intervene and I plan to knock on His door until He answers.